We are tearing down stereotypes and challenging double standards as we spotlight on the world of comedy from a woman's perspective. We talk with Madi Murphy, host of The Bad Broadcast, and share some raw, unfiltered experiences we've experienced, and the societal expectations that we combat daily.
We take an earnest look at the challenges faced by women in comedy and the power of podcasting in providing a platform for our voices. We discuss the impact of online criticism, how to handle it while maintaining our authenticity, and the importance of empathy and support within the female community. Lastly, we celebrate the connective power of comedy, its role in fostering a sense of belonging, and why, in spite of the vulnerabilities, we wouldn't trade our journey in comedy for anything else. Prepare to be entertained, informed, and perhaps walk away with a new perspective on comedy and social media!
Connect with us at @babewhatpodcast for updates, interactions, and polls.
If you want to help financially support the show, keep our mics on, and help us to continue creating high quality content, you can become a supporter of our show here and contribute as little or as much as you'd like.
Please remember to rate, subscribe, and review!
We are tearing down stereotypes and challenging double standards as we spotlight on the world of comedy from a woman's perspective. We talk with Madi Murphy, host of The Bad Broadcast, and share some raw, unfiltered experiences we've experienced, and the societal expectations that we combat daily.
We take an earnest look at the challenges faced by women in comedy and the power of podcasting in providing a platform for our voices. We discuss the impact of online criticism, how to handle it while maintaining our authenticity, and the importance of empathy and support within the female community. Lastly, we celebrate the connective power of comedy, its role in fostering a sense of belonging, and why, in spite of the vulnerabilities, we wouldn't trade our journey in comedy for anything else. Prepare to be entertained, informed, and perhaps walk away with a new perspective on comedy and social media!
Connect with us at @babewhatpodcast for updates, interactions, and polls.
If you want to help financially support the show, keep our mics on, and help us to continue creating high quality content, you can become a supporter of our show here and contribute as little or as much as you'd like.
Please remember to rate, subscribe, and review!
Welcome to Babe. What Do you Know About the podcast with your favorite husband and wife duo Sam
Tayla:and Tayla. Each week we dive deep into a new subject, blending fun and seriousness to push boundaries and buttons.
Sam:Get ready to expand your knowledge, challenge your perspectives and have a blast along the way.
Madi:But yeah, I started the Instagram a little bit before that, like like in January of 2020. So right before the pandemic I started just kind of a I don't know. I always say it was just going to be like a creative dump, like it was just going to be where I put everything, like I didn't want to put it on my personal page. So I thought of this name bad broadcast and I was like I'll just make it like this random page of like stuff that I think of. And then, after the pandemic hit, I was like, well, I should probably find a I don't know job, I should probably do something with my time, Because, yeah, I was working in a bakery before and that wasn't happening during COVID, so yeah.
Madi:So then I started the podcast and then I I say it all the time people who've heard this story are probably like we've heard this a million times. But I kept being like I'll just do it like one more week and then we'll all stop there. I'll put a couple episodes out and I don't know. And then it would like it would take a little bit more and I'd get a few more people listening and then I'd be like okay, fine, I have this other idea I want to do. So here we are, like three and a half years later. I can't believe. It's like next year will be four years doing it. It seems insane.
Tayla:I know it is wild and I, like I said, I've been listening to your podcast since 2020 and it doesn't feel like I've been listening to you for that long, or that I've heard like well, I couldn't possibly have heard that many episodes from you. That's how it feels like. It feels like so Totally.
Madi:Well, I'm like, how did I get that many hours of talking recorded, like when I'm like there's hundreds of hours. I'm like, how, how did I? How is that even out there? Like, how did I even so? Yeah, it's so weird for me too, and even still, I'm like I don't even know how it happened, but I do. I love it it's. I go through. I go through phases like we were just talking about. I'm headed for maternity leave in a couple of weeks and I'm like, okay, we gotta, we gotta get there and for the most part, it really is. It's the best job.
Tayla:So well, I'm glad, and I'm glad as a consumer, I'm glad you do it, and then you still keep doing it and kind of anything that you do you just done such a great job, kind of evolving with yourself. That's been really fun to watch over the years. So keep doing it please, and I'm sure everyone will actually say don't stop, no, no.
Madi:and I know people are like when will you stop doing it? I'm like I guess when you guys stop listening, I don't know. But yeah, life, life has definitely changed a lot in the last four years, so it's crazy that it's kind of like this journal now. That's on the like I love it and.
Tayla:I hate it, but you know life has definitely changed a lot, yeah, and I've noticed kind of you pivot with social media, which I think is probably like for the best and that's kind of. We've talked a lot about that balance with social media and especially when you're like you kind of rely on it a little bit for like promotion and marketing and whatever, but at the same time like you want to have a bit of separation like with your life Totally.
Madi:Totally. You just like don't want it to be. I always tell people. Now I'm like I used to share only like the amazing things and the great things and the big things, and now it's like those things are the things I don't share, like now I share kind of the like normal, like mundane, which which I don't know, some people like it, some people hate it, but now the really big parts of my life I'm like I think now I've learned my lesson with all the life changes I've had like to kind of keep it, keep it a little bit tighter.
Tayla:Yeah, I'm trying, sam. We're both South African, but we've met here, we've been married since and we're American now as well, and Sam was a music producer for how long was it Like a long time.
Sam:A long like eight years.
Tayla:Yeah, so he owned a record label for a couple of years and now you know he he dabbles. He's just kind of one of those people that's good at everything he does, which is a little annoying, but Well, that's that's.
Madi:That's the way to do it, cause then you always have microphones laying around.
Tayla:Yeah, exactly. Literally all the stuff that we needed. I was like go ahead and teach me, I'll do it, but he had a lot of his life when he was producing. Music was as well online, and it's been good to learn from him.
Sam:Yeah. So like I, I feel like I've become the grumpy old man like grew up on the internet and, like you know, I feel like like all the memes that I made up came the internet and then all of a sudden, like I'm like oh, instagram is just a thirst trap and TikTok oh it's just just trying to, you know, tell me it's the algorithm.
Sam:And so I've become the grumpy old man about social media now. And then Tayla's, you know, still, you know so optimistic and sees all the value in it which there is, and I'm like, yeah, it's terrible.
Tayla:Yeah.
Madi:I'm like totally no, I get it, I. I. I feel like I'm getting grumpier and I'm like is it the pregnancy or is it that I've been on the internet? But I've been on the internet too long?
Tayla:Probably a bit of both, but I would joke. Sam and I are 10 years apart too. He's 10 years older than me, so anytime he gets into grumpy old man mode, I can like really lean into that trope and be like you are.
Madi:You're literally a grumpy old man. No, I do that. I do that to my boyfriend and he's like six months older than me. I'm like, oh, you're so old, you're so much older than me, get out of here.
Sam:You don't understand my jokes, my generation.
Tayla:Literally. Yeah, that's so funny, but I'm yeah, I'm just about your age. I'm turning 30 in March and Sam's turning 40 in January, so it's a big year for both of us.
Madi:January. What what's your birthday?
Sam:January 3rd.
Madi:Well, I could. I could have a baby on your birthday. I'll let you know you could have a birthday twin 40 year gap.
Tayla:Yeah, I know you pretty well. I've been trying to explain you to Sam a little bit too and like send him some episodes and stuff and I'm like she's difficult to explain. You'll just love it, don't worry.
Madi:Hopefully not in a bad way. Hopefully you're not like this, this chick, we can't get a, we can't get a grip on her.
Tayla:No, in a good way, in a good way.
Madi:So for our listeners.
Tayla:I'm going to introduce you guys to Maddie Murphy, our guest. Maddie is the host, the sole host, of the Bad Broadcast podcast. Maybe that's a tongue twister. Say that 20 times fast. I know I should have thought that one through. I know I'd love it, and her podcast is all about her thoughts, raw about anything. She gets a lot of listeners calling in with different topics. I think you most recently did the, the liar one that you had your audience pull in on. That was very fun.
Tayla:Yes, catching liars or being caught in a lie. I've unfortunately been caught. I don't know why, but as a teenager I just panicked a lot and did like panic lies.
Madi:Yeah.
Tayla:It makes me I feel ashamed to think back about, like my, my teenage life. But whatever I've reformed and that's Maddie, she pretty much is the best to listen to I've. I've heard everything from Maddie, from Trader Joe's recommendations, which I have gone ahead and tried, and I agreed with you on most of the recommendations.
Madi:Some of them were hot. Some of them were hot takes. That was. Those are the ones that get people real riled up, or like the Trader Joe's episodes. I'm like I get it.
Tayla:You just never know you never know what people really care about. And yeah, and Maddie's also done deep dives into, like you know, different stars and their histories. Those have been really interesting too. That's bad, thank you.
Tayla:Today we're going to be talking about women and comedy, and Maddie's the perfect person for this, because I would describe what you do in a lot of ways as comedic. I feel like you incorporate comedy a lot into what you do and how you do it and it's your own real brand of it. Sam and I were, as we were thinking like what could we talk to Maddie about? That would be really interesting to hear a take. We thought, well, women in comedy. Because inadvertently we did an episode on comedians a few months ago and as I was thinking back, I was like we literally didn't even talk about one woman that was a comedian and I'm like I'm a feminist, like I'm into it, and I was just like how did I miss that? And that's like a such an interesting thing about comedy. But kind of to kick kick us off, I'd love to know kind of your, your journey or your take or your view on comedy and how that's kind of affected your career as, I would say, a woman that uses comedy a lot.
Madi:Yeah, I think it probably actually deterred me a lot from even saying that I am in comedy or that I am a comedian. I mean, I never, I never describe myself that way. You know, like I. I know that the podcast is categorized under comedy podcast, you know, and it's like that's the. I know that that's the purpose of it. You know I want people to laugh and I want, I want to make jokes and all of that. But I've really struggled with saying like, oh, I'm a comedian and I just really don't. I don't know. And so I thought a lot about why and I think that's probably a lot to do with it is that comedy is not typically like a really feminine space? You know, it's not really a place where women can just kind of pop in and be like I mean, you meet a guy who does stand up comedy three times and he's like oh, I'm a comedian.
Madi:Yeah and it's like I've been. I've been doing this for years and I'm like I guess I kind of work in comedy, kind of not really like you know, because even talking about it I'm like, am I even qualified to even talk about that? Because I'm not technically a will see. Now I'm doing it again like I don't do stand up, I don't write, you know, but I think that the world of comedy is a lot broader and I've seen a lot of other female podcasters categorize themselves as comedians, which makes me really happy because I'm like this is a form of comedy.
Madi:It's maybe not what we're used to or it's maybe not what people first think of when they think of like comedians, they don't think only podcasters. But yeah, it's definitely like made me not want to. I don't know, it's a really weird thing, but it's kind of like it's just natural, I think, for women to just under sell what they do in a lot of ways, you know, just say, oh, it's like, you know, it's just this little podcast, it's not a big deal, it's just oh, yeah, it's just for fun. And now again, it's probably the pregnancy rage and probably that I'm gonna have a daughter soon.
Madi:That like when people you know are like, oh, when are you gonna, or you're gonna, keep doing the podcast when you have a baby? Are you going to keep doing that little? And I'm like this is not a hobby. Okay, I talk about it. On today's episode that came out with Jackie Schimmel, who does the bitch Bible, we talk about this like she's like people have never asked my husband that one no, oh yeah keep doing that little, that little hobby and it's like this is my career for three and a half years.
Madi:You know, this is this is like a real job and so, yeah, I feel like kind of in the last like four or five months I've gotten a little bit, I've got a little meaner about it.
Tayla:I think it's absolutely warranted.
Tayla:I I'm not a woman in comedy and I definitely didn't do this podcast, but same thing happened with, like my first pregnancy is like people would constantly ask me my plans and I think it's like maybe it's more natural because people are curious and things are kind of changing, but at the same time, like I would get pretty mad and then, especially like I would hear someone be like oh yeah, you know this in law said that like you would change your mind, like after you have like once you're having a baby.
Tayla:You know this is like you know, this is like. I said that like you would change your mind, like after you had like once you had the baby, then then you would get it and you your plans would probably shift and change. And then I like was annoyed because I'm great. Now I'm in this position where, like I actually I then I don't have the freedom I don't feel to like really choose, like yeah, I don't want to stay home and I do want to make a life change or like I'm trapped between like proving them wrong because, like I want to do my career and do what I do.
Madi:Totally. And it's like then it's kind of, yeah, it's a very black and white choice of people. Give you it's like, well, do you love your child or do you love your career? And it's like, well, I find a lot of value in both. I find a lot of value in motherhood. I really am looking forward to it. I've always wanted to be a mom. You know. It's like I'm not, like I never I didn't start this career and think like, oh, I'm going to put off having kids. I like started this career, thinking like, oh, this is such a great addition to my life, I can't wait to do both of these things. You know like it. But it's really presented to us in a way that's like so you know what'll it be. Will it be staying home and giving your kids a good life, or will it be having a career and only thinking about yourself? And it's like, well, it's probably a lot, of, a lot of space in between there.
Tayla:Yeah, and I think, well, you said something interesting was you're like I think women do kind of, and I had the same thing like with you. I was like maybe she doesn't want me to describe her like as a comedian, because that could come with different connotations and things, but I think that women are really funny and we like to laugh about funny things and so I find it so interesting that culturally, like, comedy is something women really resonate with a lot, and I think maybe social media is a way that we kind of funneled that because, I don't know, maybe it's more accepted. But I find it so interesting that women resonate so much with comedy and I feel like it's so therapeutic in a lot of ways to like laugh about things and it feels like there's a barrier with it, you know.
Madi:No, totally, I totally agree with you and I think that, like on average, I just think that maybe women have maybe there's just fewer blind spots in kind of observations about things. My boyfriend and I talked about this before that it's like you know, just just I noticed things differently than he does because I'm a woman. You know people commenting on things differently than they would comment to him. Or you know his, his work. He works with all men, you know, so his work, workplace is very masculine. They, you know, they talk about things in a very different way. You know they talk about pregnancy, obviously different. You know, people ask him about my pregnancy and it's like that is a totally different experience, and people asking me about my pregnancy right and it's.
Madi:So I just I feel like there's there's just some blind spot. I mean it's and women have blind spots to for men's experiences Men's experiences, of course, but I think that with, like general observations of the world, I think women are just a little bit more vulnerable. Maybe or there's more weirdness or there's more criticism. So there's a lot more material sometimes, you know, like there's there's things that are said to women that would never be said to a man, and I'm like that's an opportunity for jokes that men can't relate to and can't make, and yeah, but that's not to say I don't. I mean I don't, I don't.
Madi:I don't think you guys are taking it wrong, but I always worry that people think I like hate male comedians or I hate men, and I'm like no, I love male comedians, I love stand up comedy. It is like our favorite thing to do. It's what we did on our first date. It's like we always go. We always go when somebody we love is in town, and so I love, I love male comedy. But I think that, yeah, female, female comedians definitely can point out the weirdness of being a woman, obviously a lot more, you know accurately, than men can.
Tayla:Yeah, Sam, actually he falls asleep. Took a median.
Sam:Almost every night I've been listening to some sort of comedy show. So on the rotation right now I have a British comedy show called Would I Lie to you. This is pretty good. So I just have YouTube, just kind of playing as a horse. And then another one I have, Kill Tony, which is kind of the latest fetish of mine. It's awful. I don't know if you've ever heard of it.
Madi:Yeah, yeah, my boyfriend loves Kill Tony. Yeah, he loves it.
Sam:It literally feels like a fetish or like some sort of like you know, because it's it's like not funny, but it's so funny, it's just, it's just awful.
Madi:Yeah.
Sam:And it's a lot of. It is just people being awful, but that's fun. Yeah, I don't know. It's hard to explain.
Tayla:I'm learning a lot about you right now. What's he like? Puts it on his phone right by his head, so I don't listen to it or hear it. I don't know how he falls asleep to that stuff, but oh man, I mean it's awful it's, it's its own kind of different brand of comedy.
Sam:Yeah, we should. We should listen to some more Kill Tony. And then obviously I have some sort of stand up what like, what, if like. If there's some sort of comedian that's, you know, has a net thick special, or you know release stuff, you have your own, I'll have that on for us. But yeah, I fall asleep every night to listen to some sort of comedy show.
Tayla:It would just be a light way to go to sleep. It's comforting.
Madi:Yeah, yeah, I mean, it's better than falling asleep to like true crime.
Tayla:True that, absolutely true that. But I think really good thoughts on just, I think the value that women have in comedy and I think the increasing desire for it and I think the desire has always been the appetite has always been there. But I think the expression of that and maybe it's a little bit of like general feminine rage of like, no, like we want this and we deserve it too, and I think finding it in all the mediums that we are is really important too, because, like podcasts, really resonates with a lot of women why women are freaking busy and it's nice to be able to do something like while I'm doing other stuff.
Tayla:You know totally.
Madi:And I've I've learned that people and I feel this way about podcasts that I listen to. I'm like it kind of feels like you're on the phone with somebody, like it kind of feels like you're FaceTiming somebody, like when I listen it's. It's funny because it kind of creates this bond with podcasters that I feel, with people I listen to and that I hope people feel when they listen to me. But it's like it's very intimate to like be in somebody's headphones, you know, and be, have them listening to me, and it's like it does on a in a lot of ways feel like a chit chat with somebody, more so than like if you're watching a YouTube channel or if you're watching you know it's it, I don't know. There's I've thought about it a lot like the psychology behind just audio and just that's the only you know like sense, like sense that you have. You know they can't see you, they can't, you know, feel you, anything like that. They can only hear you and I think it does create a nice little intimacy.
Sam:No, it's so true Like we've gotten feedback from some people that listen to podcast and they'll be like you know I was just saying, say this about this thing. And then I just start yelling at him when I was listening to him and I get this into it, because sometimes I'll be listening to a podcast and I just start interjecting to this person speaking. You know, over the course of the weekend they can't hear me, but oh, I'm letting them know how I actually feel about what they're saying.
Madi:Yeah, yeah, it's weird. I don't know what it is, but there's got to be something behind it, because, yeah, I do the exact same thing. If I hear something on my and I'm listening I'm always like what? No, why are you saying that? Or what do you mean? Like and yeah, so it's, it's funny. But, yeah, podcasting is definitely. I really love to see to see women start because it's it's such an accessible medium too. You know, like I, I tell people, I'm like, I know it feels hard, but I, I promise you there's good, you know resources out there. Grab a microphone, sign up for a you know an uploading site and you can do it. Just give it a shot. It's much more accessible than like a YouTube channel or doing standup comedy or things like that. Like we kind of have the world at our at our fingertips, being able to start podcasts whenever we want, which is good and bad. Some people are out here starting podcasts that I'm like maybe not.
Tayla:Yeah. Maybe that's not for you, but sometimes you really just hope, like someone would tell you if, if you were one of it.
Madi:Yeah, yeah, but no, for the most part I mean the, the podcast that I see. In the podcast that you know, I I get to go on or that I listen to. I just I feel like it's a really accessible way for people to be creative and I like that a lot.
Tayla:Yeah, I think there's something to like that intimacy where you feel like it's a relationship, and I think a lot of it is because you're kind of, I think, where I'm usually listening to podcasts in more like vulnerable situations, that like I wouldn't be watching, something like like when I had my first day, like I'd be listening to podcasts in headphones while I was breastfeeding, like in the middle of the night. Or I have a friend who listens, like in the shower or like on a drive and I think there's just something to like.
Tayla:I think it can be a really cool way to break down barriers and kind of be more receptive I don't know receptive to to what you're hearing. I don't know about it, but it is. It is like a special thing that I I'm a consumer of, like I love listening to podcasts and I think that's why we like to do it as well as we. We're just there's just like a passion for this kind of connection. It's just working, you know, for us and totally totally.
Sam:One last thing on that.
Tayla:No, please Like.
Sam:I always have this recurring theme in our podcast, like I'll bring it back to like one of my frustrations with society, because you know old man yelling at the audience.
Tayla:There it is.
Sam:Um and uh. I really like the podcast format because you have time for nuance and and to kind of work through something you know where. I feel like we've had so much content thrown in us or the most like decade to, which is just snippets, and I feel like everyone's nuances is just so tired of being, you know, put in little boxes because we only got 20 seconds of you know airtime to get an opinion. Now I really like just the long format to be able to have like nuance and in opinions, in thoughts and feelings and you know, opinion like you know, all that sort of stuff.
Madi:Yeah, it's, interesting.
Sam:Totally.
Madi:Yeah, yeah, I agree, it's like you, you get to listen to somebody's uninterrupted thoughts and I think that that's why I like I like solo podcasting for that reason that I'm like I can really flesh out an idea and like really talk about it, and it's, you know, I grew up in a big family and my whole family teases me because I'm always like nobody's listening to me, nobody's everybody's interrupting me. Nobody's like nobody's giving me five minutes, and then they all and my brother's teasing me because now they do it on purpose. I'll be in the middle of a story and they'll be like, oh, just hold on. I'm like no stop. So I don't know if it's like a trauma response that I'm like I spent my life being interrupted. So it started this podcast out of spite, where nobody can interrupt me, but it does. It does give the speaker a chance to really like.
Madi:A podcast that I love is called Time Suck and it's this comedian, Dan Cummins, and their long form. I mean they're like two and a half three hours and he really I mean like they're all solo. I mean he never has guests on, and so it's like I I feel like he gets to really dive into like why he thinks things and how he got to that conclusion. And it's made me a better like think, like critical thinker, you know why? And same with the pot, my own podcast has done the same thing.
Madi:Because when I share an opinion, like I need to tell people why I think that and I need to tell people how I got there or what happened, or you know all of those things. I can't really just say things and leave it. You know I have to. I have to because and sometimes I was saying this earlier like sometimes I just keep rambling and I'm like shut up, stop talking, maddie. But I'm like I got to fill an hour. You got to, you asked me to do an hour. Now I got to fill it with something. But it's made me think about you know why I do certain things, or why I believe certain things, or how I got to those conclusions and then have to be able to explain them to people in a way that makes sense or makes them laugh, or you know all of that.
Tayla:So yeah, I think there's an intentionality that it brings and maybe that's why, like I think, the comedy that podcasters can have like kind of a land so well, because I do think like people are more and more drawn to intentionality these days because, like I think sorry the cough over there Because a lot of like our things are chosen for us, like our consumables, algorithms, all of that, and I think we're just wanting to be intentional, even if it's just to be intentionally silly about something or intentionally funny about it, like having this space to just consume that and have someone be thoughtful about what they're conveying or bringing up.
Tayla:And I think that's really helpful. So one thing I've always wondered about, because I think I, when I was, when I started listening to you in 2020, I think that's where you started kind of releasing this funny for a girl merch and you kind of had this, this idea, that and I think I had just missed it where I was like okay, I think I get it, I get what this means and I love it.
Tayla:but I didn't get to like hear how it came about, or is there, I guess, how? How did that phrase become significant for you?
Madi:Yeah, so I. It was a DM that I got several times in the first few or in the first year of doing the podcast and the Instagram by like separate people or the same person.
Tayla:Yeah, Okay, serious no separate people, separate people.
Madi:And I have been told it before and I knew that. I knew other women that had been told it before, because it's like, it's like they're attempting a compliment and even it's it's. The the shocking thing is that it wasn't always men who said it, it wasn't always people's husbands or you know a lot of women would would say I mean, I shouldn't say a lot, but enough that it was noticeable that women would say, oh, just like for a girl, you're just, you're so funny. Or like just for a girl, you're, you know all these things, are you doing this so well for a girl? And it didn't really hit me until, like, I started doing this job where I was like, what does that even mean? I don't even get it.
Madi:And it's like I mean. And obviously what it means is that inherently, you know, women are less funny and women are less, you know, successful and women are less all of these things. And so being funny for a girl is like it's like being funny but not quite as funny as a man could be. You know, like for a girl, you're doing a pretty good job. It's like you're really I don't know I'm trying to think of like a separate.
Madi:Like you're really smart for a toddler you know it's like, yeah, you're smart, but you're still a toddler, so you're still really not as smart as an adult, which is kind of the vibe that I got. So, yeah, I remember I released on the one year anniversary of starting the bad broadcast and, yeah, people really didn't like it at first because I think they thought that I was agreeing with it. And really why I did it is that I thought it would be funny to make money off of it. Is that I'm like this?
Madi:thing, that people have been. People have been saying that is really offensive. I was like I'm going to make money off of it. People are going to send it to my DMs that I'm going to, that I'm going to profit off of it. And since it's come out, I mean we've done a couple other things. We've done like strong for a girl. We've done smart for a girl, because I know a lot of girls who are like getting their MBA or their doctorate or whatever, and they're told that they're like oh for a girl, you're so smart. Oh for a girl, you're so nice. Or girls who do weightlifting or other. You know that are professional athletes and it's like well for a girl, you're really strong. So, yeah, it's just become this funny thing. But it did end up somebody, somebody like, donated it to a, like a DI or something, and somebody found a funny for a girl sweatshirt and then they posted it on Facebook and it was like what is this? This is so offensive.
Sam:Oh no.
Madi:What? And it was like why do people think that girls aren't funny? And blah, blah, blah. Anyway, it got sent to me and so I I commented and I was like, hey, this is my merch actually, and I posted it for, or I made it for this reason, because I think it's so ridiculous and I wanted to put it on a sweatshirt so that other people could see how ridiculous it is. But yeah, it's become this kind of this, this thing, cause I, I see tiktoks now and people will send them to me where girls will say that somebody told them the same thing. And I'm like, send them a sweatshirt, send them a sweatshirt, cause we're like, if you're a woman in this space, you're bound to get that, that comment, at least once.
Tayla:Yeah, absolutely. And I, I, I kind of like hearing that background and for me, not knowing it, I kind of thought you were and I think this is is is very cool, cause a lot of people I've spoken to with the merch cause it is great merch have said like oh, I, I'm kind of reclaiming that like funny for a girl is truly a compliment, cause girls are funny. Totally I am also funny, totally.
Madi:Yeah, the reclamation aspect of it for sure is a part of it that it's like you know, it's just when, when you kind of own it in that way, it can't be used against you, you know, and it's like when, when you're the first one to say it and I think I think that's a lot of comedy in general too is like if you're the first one to make a joke about it or the first one to point it out about yourself, or the first one to make a you know, then then nobody can use it against you.
Madi:Like if you're, you know, I say this all the time with like marriage advice, like I'll give marriage advice and I'll be like who might have given marriage advice? I'm divorced and I got pregnant with my boyfriend of three months. Like I am not the person to give relationship advice, but like the more self-aware you can be and I think that's a main part of comedy is being self-aware enough that you can point out things about yourself, laugh about them, and then it kind of makes you invincible to what people are going to say about you, you know.
Tayla:Absolutely. How does that? I would love to know, like, when you have done that especially, you know, maybe even with the specific instance that you just said, how has that felt to kind of put yourself in that spot of like I'm invincible and and like you?
Madi:can't own this because I do.
Madi:Yeah, I mean, it's definitely really scary and it's definitely come with a lot of like, a lot of trial and error, because it's not fun to be vulnerable. You know, I tell people all the time like I, I didn't plan on my life going this way. You know, I didn't plan on getting divorced, I didn't plan on all of these things. But like I've just had to had to be honest about it First of all, like be honest about what it felt like and then just hope that in sharing it and a kind of laughing at it because I always say I'm like all there is to do is laugh about it now Like I can't. Like it's my life.
Madi:It happened, you know the divorce happened, I'm pregnant, you know all these crazy changes happened and what are we going to do? Like the only thing I can do is be happy about it and laugh about it and hope that somebody who's hearing it, whose life might feel crazy or like it's falling apart or like it's changing faster than they, know what to do with that. It's like, yeah, like they'll find some sort of comfort in me being able to be happy about it or laugh about it or make a joke about it. But it's definitely taken some trial and error, because sharing things like that is not fun and the internet is not always a fun place to share, share personal experiences.
Tayla:Yeah, I think there's two things that I was thinking about as you were speaking was just one of them, being that I think our parents generation, that I think people have always been pretty self aware and what people my parents, age and older like did with that was almost kind of more like hide and feel like shame and like let me try and prevent people from seeing it, and I think it's kind of been. It is interesting to watch people more age, be self aware and actually kind of more own it and like put it out there so that it can't be used in.
Tayla:It's just interesting to watch. But the other thing that you said is like the internet is not a fun place and I think that particularly for women, it can be very it can be. I think the attacks made against women online anonymously are particularly vicious and I wonder how much that does affect like women willing to put themselves out there, and especially in a comedic space, because there is always like a.
Tayla:I would say it feels like at least a more of a safety issue for women on the backlash, or like when people disagree with a man when he's making fun of something or making a joke about something. It's going to look very different than how they would disagree with a woman Absolutely.
Madi:I mean, I totally agree with you. I don't. I mean it makes me upset. It makes you know these, these snark Reddit pages or these, you know forums that people go on, or even the comment section of women's pictures or videos or TikToks or whatever it might be like they're poisonous. I mean they're really, and I've noticed it a lot more.
Madi:Being pregnant, actually, because I got so much pregnancy content and I'm like how is it that the people who are meanest to pregnant women are other pregnant women? Yeah, like, shouldn't this be like the ultimate place of empathy? That, like, you know how hard this is, you know what it's like to be pregnant, you know how scary it can be. Like, why are you deciding to like to be the person to criticize this woman or whatever? And I mean, I think a lot of it stems from women wanting to be validated. I think that we use we use other women on the internet to validate our own decisions. Sometimes, you know, it's like we want, we want them to do what we would do and we want, or we want, or we're kind of thrown off when, like, somebody makes a different parenting decision or a different career choice. And because I think we like, I think women are collective. You know, we're like. We're like pack animals, we'd like, you know to be around women.
Madi:Yeah, we're very community oriented, so we like when other women agree with us, we like feeling, and so when that is attacked or it feels like it's attacked because somebody's doing something different, it's like it upsets us on a I don't know, because I've thought about this, like why are the women or why are the people who are most critical of me? Why are they women? Why does this happen? Because it doesn't happen to men. It doesn't even women hating men. That doesn't happen. And like we like we all have stuff we want to say about male comedians or male content creators but we're more outspoken about being critical of women.
Madi:And yeah, I don't know, I've thought a lot about it and I don't know why that happens, but I just think that I think that men can get away with more. I think that they're generally less criticized, just by people in general, and women are held to a lot higher standard by each other. And yeah, I don't know, I wish I had an answer as to why, but I've gotten that far in my observation that I definitely see it, you know.
Tayla:Yeah, I think most people do see that and I think something and I just keep thinking like how do we change it?
Tayla:How do we make it so that this isn't unacceptable?
Tayla:And especially, like I've observed the same thing, just even like in the workplace, right, I've been a woman in the workplace where, in pretty much every one of my jobs, except for one, I have been like a strong minority.
Tayla:That's been like mostly men that I'm working with and men in leadership, and I have found like and I hear women say this like I don't like to work with women as much, and I have experienced that where, like other women that I would expect to find like a community and a safe space and some like at the very least, like commiseration about things we're both dealing with, actually is it's almost like competitive, and I don't think that's a natural state for women. I don't. I really think like I love working with women because we have that, and so how to change it right, how to make it so that we are each other's like best supporters, and I wouldn't say that's not happening. I would say that I've seen that in you and like the friends that you have brought onto the podcast that you've interacted with, like I see such a strong, just like absolute, unequivocal, like support for everything you want to do, like I'm your hype woman.
Madi:And I see more of that.
Tayla:but how do we like propel that more? And it's been hard, like I'm sure you've had to decide between like actually like, kind of clapping back at that behavior or just ignoring it. It's difficult to know kind of the approach.
Madi:Yeah, it's, oh, it's so hard. I wish I, I wish I had the answer. I feel like I would solve. I would like, I would like accomplish world peace, if I could.
Madi:Yeah, literally, cause I yeah. No, I agree with you. I don't. I mean, people are always like I don't want to work with women, it's too much drama, it's too much, and I'm like I don't think that's the case, I don't think that's naturally what women want. I don't, I don't know. I think that we're like I mean, I I going back to what I was saying earlier about like we're community focused. I think that, like on a on, like a cellular level, I think a lot of women are naturally on the defense, like because that's just what being a woman is. A lot of times, you know, it's like you're kind of constantly like defending yourself or you have to downplay yourself, like I don't know, we're just not, we're not, I don't even, I don't even know how to, how to phrase it, but I think that that's just how we've had to be, because that's what being a woman is.
Tayla:Yeah.
Madi:So I don't know. Yeah, I think I do go back and forth. It's like I I say something, if I acknowledge it, if I talk to them, if I, you know, but it really is. I think the way we do it is like on an individual level probably, where it's like you just have to, you know, surround yourself with women that make you feel good. You have to put effort into making other women feel good. You have to, you know, encourage that from the people around you and hope that it starts to take, and hope that, you know, everybody around you feels safe enough and secure enough that they don't feel the need to say things to people on the internet or feel insecure or anything like that. But yeah, I don't know, but once we figure that out, we're going to, we're going to be, it's going to be smooth sailing Next level, yeah, seven.
Tayla:I've talked a lot about that on. Like it's kind of the unsatisfying answer, but I think it is the true one and it just takes a lot more. Investment is like you do, in a way, have to be the change, like if you don't want, if you want like a safe environment for other women you work with, like being that home for them, being that place can help invite, I think, people to be like oh, like this is how it could be. You know, just seeing that image Totally, that takes a lot longer and it's a lot less satisfying than just being like it will definitely.
Madi:it will definitely be a process yeah.
Tayla:So I'm curious, like with you, with me, I don't think I've ever asked you this, so I am curious. It's like when you are on the internet a lot doing music, I mean, that's a kind of a vulnerable thing to put out into the universe as well as like your music, I think.
Madi:Totally.
Tayla:How did you respond or what was the experience for you when people would be like really awful to you?
Sam:I think so, just in general, for me to survive on the internet back then, whatever I showed on the internet was not truly vulnerable. Back then it was actually more like hey, this is a persona, you know, because with music you'd always have like a comment or feedback and it would be the one that, like this is trash, or you know, I've heard this before this is sounds like this or something, and it'd be like one comment out of like a few hundred. So if you live at get you, you know, you kind of want to seem like the bulk of all the support, so you can have to ignore it for the one and then two. Yeah, but I couldn't truly be vulnerable once. I would. Just, you know, like you said, it'd be so hard to like, really like hear somebody like this is trash and yeah, it is trash.
Tayla:It is trash and my whole soul was poured into it.
Sam:Well, they're like I don't like you as a person. You're like DJing a set or something. Or you're like doing production stream or something and something's like gives you negative thing. If you're completely vulnerable in that situation, yeah, it would just like destroy you. So no, like I really did, I put like it's like a very it's yourself, but you're like this is just a version of myself that I feel like I can, you know, take all that criticism, I don't know. So maybe we all kind of do that in the workplace still you know, completely vulnerable.
Sam:But you know, that's actually kind of being. One of the weird things about podcasting is we end up being truly vulnerable Like this, this, like I put out opinions there that you know don't land with everyone, and just kind of have to live with it and be okay to still defending that. You know nuanced thoughts. So, yeah, I mean, have you, you know, found that same thing Like, are you completely vulnerable in podcasting?
Tayla:That's a hard question to answer.
Tayla:I think I think I am and I think that's just mostly because I just don't have the, maybe the foresight to like think oh, I might not want to hear this about my opinion on this Like I think it helps that like we're podcasting with each other in more of a safe space, like it's just you and me at home, and so that makes it feel like I can be a lot more vulnerable and by the time I might regret it, it's a little bit too late.
Tayla:But at the same time, I don't know, I feel like, especially with comedy and you hit on this a little bit earlier, maddie that comedy does rely a little bit more. I think, if it's the comedy I like and that I think resonates with most people is like pretty vulnerable, pretty self aware, and it's finding that balance, and I think that's the difficult thing is like how do you I think I imagine that something you have to kind of dance with all the time, maddie is like how do I balance protecting myself and like my space and my humor and like my podcast with also like being vulnerable and open and enough that people resonate and feel like we have this relationship?
Madi:Totally. And that's just like the question of existing on the internet in any capacity, I think, is like how, how can I make people feel like they, they know? Because when people listen to the podcast, I'm like you do know me, I mean, we, you spent hours with me, you know, talking to me, basically listening to me, hearing my opinions on things, hearing my life experiences, hearing stories about my childhood and about my family and about all those things. And I really think that I mean I just do it one week at a time and, like I said, like going through the divorce and having a new relationship and a baby on the way has definitely made me pause about like, okay, how much should I share? And basically, where my line is is that it's like, if it's about me, if it's about my life, like I'm, I'm or if it's about my experience, I'm pretty open with it, you know.
Madi:But when it starts to creep into other people's experiences or other people's lives or people who haven't signed up to be on a podcast, you know, people are always like, Well, why don't you talk more, more about the divorce and more about this? I'm like, Well, that's another person, that's their life. You know, that's all I can talk about is where I am, where what I feel, what I'm going through, and the minute it starts to rely on somebody else's experience, I'm like, Okay, that's where I have to draw the line, because I'm not here to speak for anybody else or talk about anybody or put anybody else in the in a in a type of spotlight that they maybe don't want or didn't consent to. And that's kind of what I feel about my kid, you know. I'm like, yeah, she should get to decide. You know how much of her life is.
Madi:I don't want her to grow up and be like why did you share all of that about my childhood? Where? Why did you talk about me like that? Why did you say all of that? You know, like I want her to be at an age where she can say oh, yeah, that's okay for you to share that or that. I understand, you know, because we just don't know there's so many unknowns with children and the internet and all of that. But just as a blanket statement, I just think like if it's mine and it's solely mine and it's something that I experienced, I am, I can share that. But other than that, that's where I have to have to take a minute and say Okay, maybe that's not for me to share or that's not for me, you know, for other people to judge, but for me I'm like. I signed up for this. I signed up to be vulnerable, so I really try to be as vulnerable as I can without making it anybody else's problem.
Tayla:Yeah, I think so. Sam's divorced to, not not from me, from someone else.
Madi:You're like we're actually divorced.
Tayla:We're a divorcee podcast. Yeah, that would be fascinating, but he was divorced before and we've talked a little bit about it. But I feel like that's maybe an inadvertent litmus test. You've kind of put yourself through, subconsciously it's. I think it is a great thing to consider in general about even if you're not an influence and you have this huge reach and this huge audience, when you're putting stuff out there for other people and you have no control, then who can consume that? I think it's a great thing to consider and I think that comedians really have to think about that.
Tayla:I don't know some, some comedians who don't think about it enough, like what the experience of people they might be talking about would be and that's out of their hands, and that's a really difficult thing and I think that's why people claiming like I'm a comedian, it comes with like so much that you have to consider that people who are just consumers, who haven't thought about that other side, don't have to consider that. Yeah, wow, what? What a lot of things. Because I wouldn't consider myself a comedian or even necessarily very funny, except for when I'm not intending to be. I can be on accidentally, right, but that's something.
Madi:I just hadn't really considered.
Tayla:Thank you, I'll take it. I'll take it. But yeah, like there's just so much to consider and yeah, like.
Sam:So, like a lot of stand up comedians will say, you know, like, hey, my wife, this family friends into their their, you know.
Tayla:We're even groups of people, right, yeah.
Sam:So how do you feel about when comedians do that and do you think that they've gone through the steps of like okay and gets? I've always been kind of curious about that.
Madi:Yeah, I feel like. I feel like a lot of comedians, well, I mean, as we're learning now and it can be really problematic, but I think a lot of stories that comedians tell are not true Absolutely, which, like now we're like, which I think is pretty harmless for the most part. I mean people talk about like oh yeah, my, my wife did this or whatever, and like I would hope, if I tell a story about somebody, I always, you know, make sure they know I'm going to share it. Yeah, I mean like I don't know. I think that a lot of a lot of professional comedians, I mean you embellish, you, you know, you, you you talk it up or you maybe have one experience that was kind of like that and but now we're seeing it with, like what's his face? The comedian who's now in hot water because he made up a bunch of stories, hasan Minaj.
Tayla:Oh, oh, is he in hot water? I didn't know.
Madi:I mean his stories. I mean they were, they were bigger lies. They were bigger lies about other people. But I always think like, yeah, if you're going to tell a story about somebody or you're going to either yeah, okay with them, or make sure that they come out looking good, like, if I'm going to tell a story like that, bashing somebody which I would hopefully never do well, I wouldn't do knowingly.
Madi:I have bashed people before that I didn't think would hear it anonymously, like I had this thing happen where it's like I like saw this guy, just this random guy. I didn't know who he was. He was this random guy to comedy show actually, and I totally I roast him, I made fun of him and then somehow he found out that it was him and he found out and I'm like I didn't even, I don't even and he was like you made fun of me on the podcast. I'm like I don't know you, I don't know your name, but that was all all. That was probably not awesome of me. Yeah, I would hope that when they tell stories, especially about family kids, why they okay with the person or it's a story that makes them look really good, right.
Tayla:But so for your brand, yeah, true vulnerability and finding the funny in those situations, and those things, yeah yeah, and I think I think, depending on how and it really is such a craft comedy and I think, even if someone can still end up looking very good without just having it be kind of like a token like but she's the best you know like if some things just really funny or it characterizes them as like a really interesting person, I think there's ways to do it. But I do think to your point that like just getting consent, finding consent, making sure that they're aware of things, especially if you're like calling them out specifically, I think that's really helpful in a way, a way to just kind of navigate how they might feel at least about what you're sharing Totally, totally agree with you.
Sam:Major inspirations. I'm curious to see who you kind of draw from.
Tayla:Yeah, who, who, who do you love?
Madi:Um so my favorite? Well, my favorite just comedians, or female comedians, or anything above yeah.
Madi:All the above. Well, I would say the first, the first like funny, funny person that I really took to their like work would be Tina Fey. Like I remember reading, reading. I read Tina Fey's book right when I graduated high school bossy pants and it was the. It was the funniest thing I had ever read in my entire life and to me she's like one of the best to ever do it. I mean I love Tina Fey, I'll love her till the day I die. Um, tina Fey, like right now. I mean I love Heather McMahon. She's she just came out with her Netflix special. She has a podcast but she's been, yeah, touring doing she, she's done the whole thing stand up and now has made it to the Netflix special and I just I love her.
Madi:I love well, like, yeah, the podcaster that I really love is Dan Cummins, who now, at this point, he's the only other podcast that I listened to. I just find him really engaging really. I mean he's really, really wise. Like I feel like he's changed my mind on a lot of things, which I love. I love when people, you know, make me think a little bit harder about things, especially in comedy, so I love him.
Madi:We're going to go see Christa Stefano and I think he comes next week. He was another comedian I love and yeah, comedies, I mean it's been something that my my current boyfriend and I have really bonded over. Like I said, it's like our favorite thing to do together. So when, when we can go to comedy shows and when we can talk about comedy and watch comedy and when we, you know, find find common ground within convenience because he has a total like, yeah, he has a totally different taste, I mean, yeah, he's, he loves kill Tony, but like all of that. But then when we find common ground and this kind of like happy little little corner of the internet, I really, I really love it. But yeah, there's, there's a lot of a lot of really good. I mean I hate to even say like, oh, yeah, they're female comedians, because it should just all be one thing, but I do too.
Madi:So I'm still I'm still deconstructing all of that. Right, I love, like parent comedy. You know I love when I love dad comedy. I love. I love when people can integrate, like talking about being a parent, especially now that I'm like about to enter that and I can hopefully learn how to do it. But I love when people can be hilarious about, like how hard parenting is, and I feel like Chris is great at that.
Madi:So I would say, I would say those are, those are the. Those are the tops right now, but they change from from week to week. Except Tina face, she'll always be number one.
Tayla:This has been such a great discussion. I'm so grateful for you to come in. I was really interesting. Of course your takes, and I just love the focus that you have on like comedy being connective. I feel like you do such a great job of that and spoke to it so well, and that's that's why we love comedy as well and we're so grateful for you.
Madi:Of course, thank you so much for having me, thank you for thank you for listening to my podcast. Seriously, it's like people are like I'm sorry, it's probably annoying that I'm like, no, it is the best thing ever to hear that. So thank you so much for being here for so long and thanks for having me on.